Letting Go of Blame – Getting Over Anger

Divorce can sometimes strike an individual seemingly out of the blue – especially if you believed everything was perfectly fine in your relationship. For some, learning to let go of the anger you feel isn’t an easy task. While it’s okay to be angry about the deterioration in your marriage, it’s not okay to let it fester for long periods of time.

Here are five tips to help you let go of anger and move on with your life:

Write it down privately

Keeping a private journal can be a wonderful emotional crutch when you’re trying to process the divorce and your mental health. If you’re feeling angry, take a few moments to write down exactly how you’re feeling and why. Remember, this isn’t going to be read by anyone else – so feel free to let yourself go and write how you’re truly feeling.

Let go of the blame

It doesn’t matter whether it was something you did or whether it was something your ex caused throughout your relationship – blame isn’t going to fix the marriage. When you’re going through divorce, it’s easy to get stuck in the blame mindset; after all, hurt and anxiety are completely common and normal. After you come to terms with the blame, let go of the finger-pointing and focus your attention on moving forward, instead of back.

Forgive yourself for feeling sad

Grief is a completely normal process in a divorce – even if you were the one who requested it. For some, learning how to forgive the sadness is an important step in healing; especially if you want to move on with your life when it’s final. Take a few months to process through the grief –allowing the sadness and upset to have a place in your thoughts – but let them go when you’re done.

Seek help if you need it

There is nothing wrong with making the decision to talk to a professional about the emotional impact you’re feeling with the divorce. Many people don’t understand the impact a divorce might have – until it’s something they’re facing personally.

Make sure you understand that seeking a professional opinion is not a sign of weakness – it’s a sign of personal well-being. Recognizing the need to speak with a therapist is a positive step you can take to moving past this milestone and on to your new chapter.

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